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Writer's pictureAshley Briggs

The Unfiltered Reality of Marriage: For Better or For Worse


Marriage. The word itself conjures up images of love, companionship, and a lifelong partnership. But let's cut through the fairy-tale facade and get real about it. Brace yourselves, because we're about to dive headfirst into the unvarnished truth about how brutally tough marriage can be.


The Myth of Perpetual Bliss

Remember those lovey-dovey couples in movies who never seem to argue and are always gazing into each other's eyes? Yeah, that's not real life. In marriage, arguments are as inevitable as sunrise and sunset. You'll argue about money, chores, in-laws, and sometimes, you'll argue just because you're tired and cranky. Those picture-perfect moments are just that – snapshots carefully curated for the highlight reel.


Expectations vs. Reality

Before marriage, we tend to paint an idyllic picture of what our life with our partner will look like. We imagine endless laughter, passionate intimacy, and unwavering support. But reality has a knack for throwing curveballs. Your partner might not always understand you, and you might not always be on the same page. And that's okay. But it's hard. Really hard.

Monotony and Routine

Remember the thrill of those early dates, the excitement of discovering new things about each other? Over time, that novelty wears off, and you find yourselves settling into a routine. While routines provide stability, they can also lead to boredom and complacency. Suddenly, you're arguing about whose turn it is to take out the trash instead of having deep, soul-stirring conversations.


Balancing Me and Us

You know that cliché about how you should "complete" each other? Yeah, that's a load of bologna. In reality, you're two distinct individuals with your own desires, dreams, and quirks. Balancing your personal identity with the identity of your marriage is like walking a tightrope. Sometimes, you might lose sight of yourself in the process, and that can be painfully isolating.


Intimacy Isn't Always Intimate

Sure, marriage comes with its share of physical intimacy, but that's not the whole story. Emotional intimacy is just as crucial – and just as challenging to maintain. Life's stresses can chip away at the connection you once had, leaving you feeling like strangers living under the same roof.

Parenthood: The Ultimate Test

If you thought marriage was hard, try adding kids to the mix. Parenthood is a whole new level of difficulty that can strain even the strongest of marriages. Sleepless nights, endless diaper changes, and the constant juggling act between your roles as partners and parents can leave you feeling drained and disconnected.


Growing Apart, Not Together

Change is inevitable, and as individuals, you'll evolve over time. Sometimes, that evolution can pull you in different directions. Interests change, goals shift, and suddenly, you realize you're not the same people who said "I do." Navigating these changes while trying to keep your marriage intact is a Herculean task.


Marriage is a rollercoaster ride through the depths of human emotion. It's not easy, and anyone who tells you otherwise is either incredibly lucky or conveniently forgetful. But here's the silver lining: Amidst the struggles, the arguments, and the moments of doubt, there's the potential for growth, learning, and a love that withstands the test of time. So, while marriage might be brutally hard, it's also an opportunity for unparalleled connection and companionship – if you're willing to weather the storms together.



So WHY get married?!? Well as hard as marriage is there are also a LOT of perks that come along with it.


Emotional Fulfillment and Support

One of the most prominent benefits of marriage is the emotional fulfillment and support it provides. Research consistently shows that married individuals tend to report higher levels of happiness and life satisfaction compared to their unmarried counterparts. The emotional bond formed through marriage creates a sense of security, companionship, and intimacy that can positively impact mental health. A study conducted by the National Institute of Mental Health found that married individuals generally experience lower rates of depression and anxiety. Having a partner to share life's ups and downs can provide a strong buffer against emotional distress.


Improved Physical Health

Believe it or not, marriage can also contribute to better physical health. Numerous studies have revealed that married people tend to lead healthier lifestyles. From encouraging each other to adopt healthier habits to providing emotional support during health challenges, spouses often play a crucial role in promoting well-being. A study published in the Journal of Epidemiology & Community Health found that married individuals have a lower risk of heart disease and are more likely to recover successfully from surgery. The emotional support and caregiving that come with marriage can contribute to faster healing and improved overall health.

Longevity and Life Expectancy

The benefits of marriage extend to longevity as well. Research consistently indicates that married couples tend to live longer than their unmarried counterparts. A study published in the Journal of Marriage and Family found that married individuals have a higher life expectancy, especially as they age. The companionship and shared responsibilities in marriage can lead to a healthier lifestyle, reduced stress levels, and an increased sense of purpose – all of which contribute to a longer, more fulfilling life.


Financial Stability and Security

Marriage can also offer a significant level of financial stability and security. Combining incomes and resources often leads to improved financial well-being, making it easier to weather unexpected expenses and plan for the future. Additionally, married couples can benefit from certain tax advantages and better access to insurance coverage. A study published in the Journal of Marriage and Family revealed that married couples are more likely to own homes and have higher net worth compared to unmarried individuals. The pooling of financial resources can provide a stronger foundation for achieving long-term financial goals.

Sanctification

Marriage is often seen as a sacred union that holds the power to transform individuals into a likeness that reflects the virtues of selflessness and sacrifice, mirroring the character of Christ. This transformation is rooted in the profound commitment that marriage entails, where two individuals willingly choose to intertwine their lives, dreams, and aspirations. As the journey unfolds, the couple navigates the complexities of life together, learning to prioritize each other's needs and desires above their own. In this process of mutual sacrifice and compromise, a deeper sense of empathy and understanding flourishes, fostering an environment in which love flourishes and matures. Just as Christ selflessly gave of Himself for the greater good, so too does a married couple learn to set aside personal wants in favor of nurturing the well-being and happiness of their partner. Through this transformative journey of sanctification, marriage serves as a vessel through which the couple evolves into a reflection of Christ's unconditional love and devotion, inspiring others through their selflessness and unity.


While marriage may not be the right choice for everyone, the benefits it offers are undeniable. From emotional well-being and improved physical health to financial stability and social support, the rewards of marriage extend across various aspects of life. Research consistently underscores the positive impact that a loving and committed partnership can have on individuals and their overall quality of life. So, whether you're considering taking the plunge or reflecting on the value of your existing marriage, remember that the journey of matrimony is indeed worth the many rewards it brings.

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